Tertiary, My Dear Watson: Butt-face (no, really)

Hello, there.

Between Tuesday, December 13^th and Monday, December 19^th, I have five finals. I just finished my third of five. So if I skip town now (I’ve done the math), I will have attended the majority of my finals. That makes going home now justifiable, right? In America, we don’t strive for perfection, we strive for justification of our actions. Thanks. (Note: There was some confusion. I'm not actually leaving before I finish my finals. I just want to.)

Remember when I said this: “Started crocheting my next project… a baby blanket! I’m excited. None of you were especially impressed with the hat so I won’t elaborate too much” (Somerville, 11/25/2011) (please never actually cite things that way). I lied! Because crocheting is to me like hockey is to Derek. No one cares, but I’m interested in it. Only compared to hockey, crocheting is (a) less violent (b) more useful, but (c) potentially less marketable, unless you don’t mind spending your weekends at craft fairs and making insanely low wages. Of course, how many hockey players go pro, and even if they do, who cares. Just kidding, Derek. Well, I’m not, but I was just trying to see if I could turn your face Uncle Vernon purple. I know you understand what that means; see, I’m trying to recover now. You’re great.

Anyway, back to that cool thing, crocheting, which is like that band Slipknot only without five extra musicians. It’s not really like that band Slipknot, except basically crocheting is the process of tying a whole bunch of slipknots together to make something. Like a hat, or a blanket, or a scarf, or a stupid dog sweater. And ((ohdearlord I thought my fish was dead for a moment there, but he’s not! Just resting.)) basically you use a hook to expediate the knot-tying process. Also, I thought that “expediate” was a word, but my computer just told me it is “expedite”. I left in the error so you guys don’t think I’m smart. Sorry Ms. Topping, if you’re reading this.

Anyway, the blanket is progressing well. I’ve included a picture of the size of the hook as compared to an equally-blue pen and the ten squares I’ve completed (out of thirty-six). I can’t quit on the blanket yet because (I’ve done the math) I haven’t completed the majority of it. That makes quitting unjustifiable, right? In America, we don’t strive for perfection, we strive for—oh wait I’ve already told you what we strive for, I should stop.

There are ten squares here, just one is being eclipsed.

Alright, so you guys are totally in stitches over that last joke. Or you’re in slipknots, since it was about crocheting, not sewing. I am so hilarious! You all must love and miss me dearly.

Seeing as I am the last post before our hiatus (Jason shout out), and my post will have the most post views ever and I’ll seem insanely popular, I feel all warm and fuzzy. This last semester is not summarizable, but if I tried to do it, my comments would be mostly positive. I learned at least a couple things (ie crocheting), and my relationship with Devin got much stronger (that whole “heart grows fonder” thing is only true when you communicate well and prioritize each other, and we succeeded there), and I had the opportunity to pay way too much money for not enough instruction (my parents and my merit scholarship helped). There have been some ups and downs, but I feel like I’m in a good place in my life, just definitely ready to come home and revisit Newport and all the lovely people in it.

Me and my boy.

Hopefully we all got A’s on all our finals and we can conclude our first college semester(s, since between the five of us there are that many first college semesters) with smiles and good feelings before gleefully retreating home into the arms our our beloveds. My beloved is Devin, Derek’s beloved is his room of maps and solitude, Jason’s is Derek cuddle opportunities, Nicole’s is Derek cuddle opportunities, and Rich’s is Derek cuddle opportunities. Glad I summarized that accurately.

Goodbye for now, but we'll see each other soon.

-Rachael