TIME TRAVEL

"Wow Rich, I could have sworn you were supposed to post on Thursday."
"IT IS THURSDAY WHAT ARE YOU TALKING ABOUT" /embarrassed

Okay.  I'm sorry I didn't post on time.  Skip ahead to "YESTERDAY" if you want to find out why.  Or, if you care about my life, read the whole thing! =D

Weird.  Ass.  Shit.

FRIDAY LAST: Wasn't really that exciting.  Woke up, had Hum, did a bio lab, got home, drank some root beer and read in the common room till people came out.  We watched anime.  Hellsing.  Some weird-ass shit right there.

SATURDAY LAST:  Saturday was a good day.  Woke up at like eleven o'clock, had lunch.  Then I went outside and just kinda walked around in the canyon that's right next to my dorm, found a scenic route to my theatre, and did that.  Then Anna Laura's boyfriend got here, and we all went to a thai place that's right near our dorm (10 minute walk).  It was FUCKING DELICIOUS.  We ended up eating 4 orders of curry, 2 of pad thai, 1 fried rice, and 2 beef.  Among 8 people. Upon returning to the dorm, we all sat in the common room and played a board game.

Figure 1. I wasn't actually going to post a penis.

Then...CHATROULETTE.  Ho damn there were some penises to be had (see figure 1).  Then there was this one girl masturbating, and we placed bets as to whether it was really a girl masturbating, or if it was just some guy sharing porn with the world.  We watched to the end to determine, and it was just porn.  This brought up the idea that this guy is actually a mad scientist, using watching people's reactions to quality porn on chatroulette as a sociology experiment.  Needless to say, I fucking love Reed.  After I had had enough of this, I went to bed to read Game of Thrones, but Ted stayed up.  He ended up having an hour long conversation with a guy about being a college girl with a deformed nipple.  My kind of guy.


SUNDAY LAST: Sunday morning was kind of the same drill as Saturday, in that I was asleep for all of it.  After I woke up, I had just enough time to eat leftovers and chill out before heading off to the first Iphigenia and Other Daughters rehearsal, which I was cast in as a male chorus member.  I had been called back for Orestes, as you may all recall, but the 23 year old non-traditional student who's built like a greek god and has a voice like sex inside of gravel beat me to it.  So I'm working with the guy who read the script as a "funny ironic thing about like...Greek people".  The other members of the cast are, I'm sure, good actors.  I'm not pretending I'm better than them, and I really do think that the guy who beat me to Orestes is better suited to the character (read: way more manly and attractive than me).  What I will say is that I hate this play.  It's all highfalutin' crap about how women have been left out of history, and are stuck doing dishes while men make the world turn.  It's supposed to be commentary on how women's oppression will always lead to death.  It's supposed to involve a powerful scene in which a brother and sister recognize each other and kill their mother in a misled attempt to restore balance to the world, in the end perpetuating a continuous cycle of war (another of the play's confused messages). What it ends up being, though, is bullshit.  Really literary bullshit.  But EVERY ACTOR TAKES IT SERIOUSLY.  When the male chorus read, who DURING THE FUCKING AUDITION THAT THEY ALL APPARENTLY SUCCEEDED AT WERE TOLD TO READ QUICKLY AND EXPRESSING THE EMOTION OF JOY, THEY SOUNDED AS THOUGH THEY WERE RECITING A FUNERAL DIRGE.  Holy mother of God.  Then, the female lead (who I have a lot of respect for as a poet, I've heard her perform some stuff she's written), reads every line, EVEN IF STAGE DIRECTIONS CALL FOR JOY, as if she's listing off numbers from a ledger, because the play is so "heavy" and "deep" and "FUCK-THIS-I-HATE-EVERYONE".  But anyway.  The male lead's voice reminds me of this guy.  He's a better actor though: 

MONDAY LAST: This is really boring, but I kinda just woke up, went to class, then did homework all day on monday.  =(

WOOO MONDAYS!

TUESDAY LAST:  Similar, but I have one small story.  Well two actually.  On tuesday I made a neutral mast.  Holy FUCK will you hear about this when I talk about Thursday.  Then, after my bio lecture, I took my friends to this awesome thing under the bio building where you walk into this like...basement area and then the walls are arranged just so that the echoes can perfectly hit each wall repeatedly.  Then my friend hit the resonant frequency of the wall at a really high pitch, and it...hurt.  Cause it was loud as shit.  And echoed for like EVAR.

WEDNESDAY LAST: So on Wednesday I did the typical wake up, class, etc. business but I also had a SUPER FUN CHEM LAB.  Do you guys remember spectroscopes?  Those little plastic purple things that you held up to your eye and they made rainbow lines and you could figure out what elements were in a lamp using only your MIND?!  Well, I got to use those.  Except I was in a pitch (which I originally wrote as "bitch") black room.  So I had to have my partner shine a bright flashlight at the wavelength scale so I could see it, but NOT in the little slit, or the halogen or led or whatever would create lines that would muck up our results.  And my partner had bad breath.  And we were looking at little tiny flames for most of it, so I had to sit next to fire for like a year with my stinky partner waving a light in my face.  WOO SO MUCH FUN.

Here is how I now imagine my Theatre professor.

YESTERDAY: OH MY GOD SO MUCH CLASS I'M SO SORRY.  I woke up at 8:30.  I have class from 9 to 10:30.  At 11 I meet with my Theatre 210 scene partner to work on these fucking scenes with a 30 minute lunch break in there somewhere.  Then we perform with these dumb masks.  They're neutral masks and they're supposed to be used to stop you from emoting with your face so that you learn to act with your body.  HOWEVER, our theatre teacher (also the Iphigenia director...sense a pattern?) seems to think it's more worthwhile to have you transform into a child who has NO CONCEPTION OF REALITY whenever you wear your mask.  HOLY FUCK WHY?!  I hate this.  Then, when I'm done with theatre, I get back just in time to enter the common room when people are talking about theatre.

My calm discussion face.

 I got sucked into yelling about how much I hate it (I admit, I probably could have written a post instead of doing this...but come on...me giving up an opportunity to be angry?).  AND OH GOD DO I HATE IT.  You guys got the boiled down version, but I was complaining for an hour about how pointless this class is, and then got into what my cirriculum would be, to the point where I had TWO THEATRE MAJORS SAYING THAT MADE WAY MORE SENSE.  And a really smart kid who's a bio major.  But anyway.  Then I got to go down and trek around in the canyon and start catching fish (I have to go pick up the traps in 20 minutes) which was really fun.  I wore hip waders.  They're stylish.  Got out of there at six, dinner, then dance from 7 to 9.  Did my reading for today's Hum 110 lecture till 11, and went to bed.  I love all y'all.

-Rich