Fleshlights anyone?

There are many things I'd like to convey in this post.  Many of them, however, will not get said due to my sickness which has been progressively getting worse over the past three weeks.  Yes, I've been sick for three whole weeks, and am still not better.  This is due to some stupid doctor who wouldn't believe me when I said I wasn't getting any better and my sore throat felt like strep throat (having had this before).  She insisted it was merely a virus that I would get over in a couple days.  So, upon revisiting the doctor (a different one this time) this morning, she (also a woman doctor, but not to be confused with the other bitch) immediately thought I had strep and sent me down to the lab to take a strep test.  Luckily, it turns out I don't have strep, but I most likely have laryngitis (Mr. Coe anyone?) and I've been prescribed some antibiotics.

My issue comes with this fucking joke of a doctor that saw me the first time I went in.  I understand the new trend towards not giving antibiotics as readily as they did before, but this doctor was insistent that I had a virus without even taking a look down my throat. She based her diagnosis on the fact that because my sore throat had improved (minimally! I said minimally!) ever so slightly, it was a sign I was on my way to recovery and apparently didn't even deserve the attention of an oral examination.  So my point is: bitches be crazy... and we need better doctor's out there. So Rich... Get to it.

So I'm not really feeling all that well, and right after I post this I'm going to try and go to bed.  My one story I will relate to you guys this week is my pledge event that was held on Saturday.  An interesting event this turned out to be, we all (the pledge class) bused over to a store by the name of Good Vibrations.  Good Vibrations, in case you're unaware, is a sex toy shop.  Our goal for the day was to have a conversation as straight-faced as possible about one of the sex toys with a worker there. Quite the interesting pledge event...

One of my fellow pledges learned that when using whips, it is much easier to enjoy smaller whips than larger ones.  Large whips often tire one out because you need to use your full arm.  Shorter whips are much more efficient because you only need to use your wrist muscles, making you last longer.  Also, my other pledge brothers found out that lube generally has an inverse relationship when it comes to flavor and moisturizing qualities.  I'm sure you are all glued to your seat, scribbling down all these wonderful tips for use later, so I won't beat around the bush and I'll get to what my conversation with Terri (yes, fucking Terri. I'm pretty sure she was a lesbian as well) was about.

I had a lovely conversation about a certain vibrating fist dildo that happened to be on display.  I pretended to be a "novice at being penetrated" (quotes are from my actual conversation) and wondered "how I could ramp up to such an erotic device."  She informed me that "like any muscle in the body, the anus (this is where I almost broke down laughing; something about the word anus still cracks up my inner twelve year old) needs time to adjust and expand."  She suggested I try one of the dildos with varying widths so I could start small and eventually get up to the magical fist.

So yeah, that was the highlight of my week. How was yours?

Jason

P.S. Just had tom yum noodle soup. Pretty delicious. I only thought to include this because I think Rich told me to try it like a billion years ago. That is all.